请各位英语达人帮我改下作文,超急!马上考研!Dear Li Ming,I am writing this letter to congratulate you on your being successfullyadmitted to Peking University.Your hard work has paid off and we are all so proud of you .How to get prepa

请各位英语达人帮我改下作文,超急!马上考研!
Dear Li Ming,
I am writing this letter to congratulate you on your being successfullyadmitted to Peking University.Your hard work has paid off and we are all so proud of you .
How to get prepared for your university life?I am so happy to give yousome suggestions as follows.First,being independent of parents in life andemotion.Second,taking exercise every day.Besides,traveling with your classmates during these months.Yunnan and Hangzhouare great choices.It will be an unforgettable memory(表回忆时,可数) in your whole life.
Congratulate you again and I wish you have a colorful life in university.
Sincerely,
Zhang Wei

1.paid off 可以考虑改为 works,感觉pay off 一般指金钱收益上的
2.第二段第一句,如果要表达如何安排你的大学生活,那你这句不太正确.可以 How to have your university life well prepared?或者 What's your plan to have a wonderful unidersity life?
3.independent of 应该改为 independent from 表示从.独立起来.
4.最后一段,i 可以去掉,have 也可以去掉,wish you a .如果要有have,改为 Hope you have a.
congratulate you again 也可以换成 congratulations to you again...

has paid off 改为has been paid off
being independent /taking exercise / traveling 应为动词原形
Congratulate you again 改为Congratulation again!
in university 改为in the university

建议：你给他的建议用 祈使句即 Be independent ... take exercise... travel with...
最后 一段前后一致： Congratulate .... and wish...

Congratulations to you again and wish you have a colorful like in university.

Dear Li Ming, I am writing this letter to congratulate you on your successfull admission to Beijing University. Your hard work has paid off and we are so proud of you . How do you get prep...

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Dear Li Ming, I am writing this letter to congratulate you on your successfull admission to Beijing University. Your hard work has paid off and we are so proud of you . How do you get prepared for your university life? I am happy to give you some suggestions. First, be independent. Second, do exercise every day. Also do take time to relax. I suggest you , travel with your classmates during these months. Yunnan and Hangzhou are great choices. It will be an unforgettable memory(表回忆时,可数) in your whole life. Once again, Congratulate!! I wish you have a colorful life in university. Sincerely, Zhang Wei

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