批改雅思作文The society would benefit from the ban on forms of advertising because it serves no useful purposes and can even be damaging.To some extent do you agree or disagree with the opinion?我的作文：Nowadays,with the development of th

批改雅思作文
The society would benefit from the ban on forms of advertising because it serves no useful purposes and can even be damaging.To some extent do you agree or disagree with the opinion?
我的作文：
Nowadays,with the development of the modern technology ,we can get information from various ways,such as TV shows,the Internet and newspapers.I n the meantime advertisements show a unstoppable improving trend,however,there are certain advertisements which are useless and unmeaningful at all,whether should ban the forms of the advertisements has become a controversial issue.From my own perspective ,i totally agree with that point .
It is manifest that regulate the advertisements will substantially save our time and money.This point can be best illustrated with that the advertisements for the medicines which is exaggerated the production's functions.With the proper rules for that advertisements,doubtless,will save our precious money and valuable time ,even life ,especially for the people who are in the edge of death.Furthermore ,ban the form of advertising can purify the advertisements.Specifically ,certain bans can prevent some company put pornographic and violent contents in there advertisements for the sake of attracting more individuals to watch and purchasing their products.Last but not least,after banned the advertisements' forms ,we can see more useful and practical advertisements .
Everything has its dark side .it side warranted to give to much bans for the advertising that would engender amount of monotonous advertisements.If all the advertisements looks like all the same that would make us felt time-consuming and uncomfortable.and more dislike to watch advisement in a vicious circle .
To sum up ,everything necessities bans,otherwise ,it will definitely loose control and lead to damage .And I strongly believe that even with the bans,the advertisements still can be creative and meaningful.

尽量不要用we,you,等代词,可以使用individuals等来代替.
第二段company要复数
第三段应该是all the advertisments looks like the same 小错误应该要注意一下哦～
我觉得这篇作文可以拿到6.5到7了

呃...高中生路过，拿两分闪人，等高人出现吧。