What's the meaning of "the hard way"?The original sentence:Many of us learn,most likely the hard way,that what brings happiness during dating is quite different from what satisfies us “until death do us part".It would be better if the explanation i

What's the meaning of "the hard way"?
The original sentence:
Many of us learn,most likely the hard way,that what brings happiness during dating is quite different from what satisfies us “until death do us part".
It would be better if the explanation is in English.
Thanks a lot.

It means that we only learn after we have suffered pains from love,rather than just learning it easily (without pain),for example,from books.只有在经历过痛苦以后才会学会长大,这就是'the hard way'.